Posted by: wordofthevine | November 7, 2017

Holiness: Keeping a Loving Perspective!

I’ve learned many wonderful things in working with the dying as a chaplain. For one, I am particularly moved by their example in letting go of petty worries to focus on people important to them and key aspects of living. They seem to seek a greater awareness of what has given their lives meaning and who they love and have positively influenced in their living.

I am reminding myself of this, for example, on those nights when I feel upset about something I have no control over, like maybe, when a relative is grouchy and snaps at me through out the weekend. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have grown up some and try not to over react, but my poor husband has had to listen and support me when I’m over tired. Usually the next morning, I get a better perspective and move on with life. Maybe it is my husband’s supportive presence that assists me to get a new way.

I’m remembering how one woman, who had just months to live, clasped the hand of her husband and looked him in his eyes and said, “You have been God’s greatest gift to me. You are goofy in a good way and have brought such joy to my life.” In the same breath she said, “That’s not to say that we haven’t had moments that seemed to go on forever, but you made the difficulties something I could deal with. Thank you, my husband… thank you for everything!”

After I walked out their door, I remembered how I had felt yesterday, grocery shopping with my husband. We were getting irritated with each other over the dumbest things. Grocery shopping is a new skill for John. He studies prices seemingly longer than I have. Other moments, we spend wasted time trying to find each other, for we go to opposite corners to get different items and we lose each other. Next time this happens, and I’m sure it will, I want to be “goofy” and find the humor in it. I want to say like this woman, even in the “dumb moments,” John, you’ve made life moments better by being there.”

What about you? What gets in the way of you living the moments focused on the important people? When you look ahead, and think about the end, what do you want to be able to say to those you love? ~ Mary


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