Posted by: wordofthevine | February 21, 2018

When others slight or hurt us, what’s another way?

Maybe I am too sensitive. I seem to remember hearing that growing up somewhat regularly. Even now, I can’t say that I don’t cherish the times that I am noticed or praised for who I am or for what I’ve done. It feels good.  While this is part of our human nature, in reading the Saints writings, I see that I am invited into new vision and understanding about the “downer moments” of life.

While I’m not talking about staying in an unsafe situation, ordinary humiliations can be extra ordinary teachers for us on the path of holiness and mature living. When grace percolates through us from a real and personal relationship with Jesus, we become capable of beautiful growth. In a certain sense, we can lose a self focus to gain a docility to the Spirit that brings us and others through us, true life.

Venerable Concepcion Cabrera, “Conchita” who I have regularly read and wrote about for the almost twenty years wrote, “Humiliations in the autumn of the soul are indispensable for her to be happy; they constitute her food, her delight and her repose. she feels miserable and hungry when she is not given this bread. The unfavorable judgments of others no longer touch or move her, because she has experienced her deformity, has felt her weakness…she has contemplated herself a great deal through glasses that never lie, those of humility, being happy in her poverty and ever trying to submerge herself in the deepest forgetfulness of self, which is where the Beloved is found!” from Seasons of the Soul, p. 31.

While her language seems to be from another era, I’m not suggesting that we work to hate ourselves. I am inviting us to learn to welcome humiliations as opportunities to mature into fuller self forgetfulness and ability to love others. We always will encounter challenges at the hands of others for we are not in heaven yet. Maybe this Lent, in the course of ordinary living you could grow in real time holiness! ~ Mary Kaufmann, Director of Incarnate Institute.


  1. I needed to read this today and ponder.. this has been my lent this year and thru the tears ,I see God working in me.Thank you for writing this!

    • I’m so glad that this was helpful to you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: